The Last Chance Saloon

The mind loves its little games at times.

It imagines things that cannot be.

It invents ideas that have not been.

It plays and teases with both the conscious and unconscious parts of our self.

Especially when one emerges from the cocoon of slumber the mind still continues to operate in a dreamlike hallucinatory state.

Some psychologists recommend having a pad and pen by your bedside to capture what remnants remain to really find new insight and creativity.

Early-rising first thoughts are pure, uncensored, unfiltered and raw and playfully shake memory and thought together to imagine worlds akin to Wonderland.

To quote Robin Williams: “You´re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn´t lose it.”

It is in this spirit that I now write these words at 0545 in the Landschlacht morning.

My mind shakes several ideas together…

Time and many other magazines every so often produce commemorative issues with titles like “The Year in Pictures”, “Bob Smith: A Life Remembered”, “The Legacy Edition”, etc.

On occasion a special event like a Royal Wedding or an Olympiad will also become excuses to publish special glossy editions of excellent quality rarely shown the rest of the year. (Idea 1)

NASCAR drivers display on their jumpsuits badges that clearly show which companies have sponsored the driver, the car and the assembled team.
(Idea 2)

There exists newspapers for horse racing, for example, the Racing Forum, that analyse the contenders’ chances for winning, using criteria like bloodlines, life history of the horse, previous racing record of both the horse and the jockey, the condition of the track on racing day, and on and on with many miscellaneous details.

These papers have their devotees who follow these minutae with religious intensity. (Idea 3)

Every year the English language acquires another 3,000 to 5,000 new words to itself.

These are words coined by writers, journalists, politicians and celebrities that somehow find their way into ordinary speech and thought.

Sometimes these words previously existed but someone somehow invented a new meaning for them that captures new ideas. (Idea 4)

When travelling on a German Autobahn one encounters signage that indicates how far it is until the next gas station.

Similar signs also exist in North America before driving into isolated areas with cheerful warnings like “Last Gas for 200 miles”.

Gambling cities and frontier towns will often have establishments with names like “Last Chance Saloon” as a reminder that it’s your “last call for alcohol” before entering the desert or wilderness.
(Idea 5)

In Russia the voter is rewarded on Election Day with a flower to both thank and show his/her participation in the voting process. (Idea 6)

In the United States presidental elections take place every 4 years.

The next one is in November 2016, but as early as this year of 2015 potential candidates “throw their hats into the ring” and announce their intention to stand for election for the office of the President.

They will spend the next 12 months seeking to be chosen by their party delegates as the two prime candidates to represent the parties in the final fight for the office. (Idea 7)

Australia fines people who do not vote in their election.
(Idea 8)

Now, let´s mix up these ideas in the spin cycle of the mind…

I propose a special publication we could call the Last Chance Saloon.

It would be a commemorative magazine or book that clearly defines every political candidate´s previous record, his/her special interests and sponsors, his/her bloodline and family connections, a record of how he/she previously voted on issues of importance and an assessment of his/her chances in the upcoming election.

It would be a candid, non-biased, non-partisan publication that would spare no feelings, withhold no criticism, and without prejudice express its opinions.

Saloon would represent the idea of a last chance to render a sober decision.

I also propose as an incentive to vote: free alcohol given to the voters when they appear at the election booth.

It would be great…

a shot of whiskey to bolster the courage to vote…

a shot of bourbon to reward the voter for his/her decision to exercise his/her democratic right to vote.

And if the candidate he/she chose to elect turns out to be a bad choice in retrospect, then the voter could, with clear conscience, blame the alcohol for what was clearly NOT a clear-headed decision.

Am I a genius or what?

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